This is part 7 of a series. To read parts 1 – 6, please click here.
“and you come away with a great little story, of a mess of a dreamer, with the nerve to adore you.” – taylor swift
That first week had been an absolute blur. From meeting Kyle, to finding out he had a girlfriend, to him trying to set me up with Mike, it all felt so quick. I didn’t even feel like I had time to process that I wasn’t interested in Mike anymore, but let’s be honest, I couldn’t be interested in Kyle. I figured now that fall break was over for the University of Utah, things would calm down and go back to normal. Who knew what “normal” would be like with Kyle back in school, but I was ready for it.
Sunday came and I was going to have some friends over to watch a movie. I debated whether to invite Kyle, but something kept nagging me to text him. So I invited him. Casually. Trying to play it cool. Trying to make it seem like one friend simply inviting another friend…..to be nice…..to not exclude. Ya know…..a “no pressure” situation. But really I was dying inside and wishing that even with his girlfriend back in town, he might choose me over her. Turns out….I was wrong.
He told me he had plans, and it turned out he went to hang out with her. I shouldn’t be surprised, and in all reality he did nothing wrong. The whole entire plan, was for Kyle to help set me up with MIKE. So why was I so bummed out? Obviously that whole “I’m moving on, I’m done liking him” thing had not gone over as well as I had hoped.
The beginning of the week was pretty typical. Kyle was still texting me off and on, and I mentioned to him that him and Mike should come to this Halloween party that Meghan was planning for the following week. And then we made plans for just the two of us on Thursday. I didn’t know what I was doing. He had a girlfriend…..but things obviously weren’t THAT serious, because they didn’t even seem to be together much and we talked ALL the time.
Thursday rolled around and I had a church meeting I needed to attend. Kyle texted me saying we should hang out after my meeting and that he would come over when I was done. Boy did that meeting drag on and on and on. As it began to get later and later, I began to wonder if this meeting didn’t end soon, Kyle would probably not come over anymore. Luckily, it finally ended and we met up. He had a soccer game in Murray, so after the game we sat in his car and listened to….Taylor Swift.
If you know me, you know I LOVE Taylor Swift. So when Kyle told me that he was a big fan too, I about lost it. I pulled out my Taylor Swift albums and had him listen to Speak Now and Red. He had left on his mission before Speak Now came out, so he had only heard a handful of songs since being home. We sat there and talked for the entire CD about Taylor Swift, how he almost went to a concert and what songs were my favorite. I couldn’t believe that I had met a guy that would just sit in a car with me and listen to an entire Taylor Swift album with me. (Side Note: The first song on the Speak Now album is “Mine”. That became “our” song and was our first dance at our wedding.)
And just like that…..he had me. Every bit of me that didn’t want to “like” him and every bit of me that just wanted to be friends, was gone. I couldn’t do it and I didn’t care. I didn’t care that he had a “girlfriend”. I didn’t care that I had apparently wanted to date Mike. I didn’t care that I had NO idea how he felt or what was going on. This kid was different. There was something about him that felt easy, comfortable, and safe. All those times I told myself it was over, were out the door. This wasn’t over. I cared too much, and I knew he felt it too. So I decided to wait. I’d be patient and I’d hold out. Because something was about to begin.
Halloween season wasn’t going to be a “scare” anymore. I think it was moving to the season of “care”…..and I was ready for it.